


Shadows of our past

by Lost_In_Translation (Liarian)



Category: Venom (Comics), Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Blasphemy, Cannibalism, Depression, Fluff and Angst, Heterosexual Sex, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jealousy, Mild Gore, Misunderstandings, Molestation, Oral Sex, Other, POV Eddie Brock, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Slave Trade, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-07-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:34:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24478774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liarian/pseuds/Lost_In_Translation
Summary: "Eddie," a plaintive whimper crossed his thoughts. "Eddie, we're sorry. We are here” barely a thread of voice, imperceptible between the cries that overwhelmed him asking to end everything. "Eddie, don't leave us."“Vee? Oh my God!” Eddie lost his balance. "I've missed you, damn parasite." He laughed hysterically through tears. "Don't ever do something like that to me again."
Relationships: Eddie Brock/Venom Symbiote
Comments: 13
Kudos: 133





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Bad Life](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22622314) by [Lost_In_Translation (Liarian)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liarian/pseuds/Lost_In_Translation). 
  * A translation of [Sombras del pasado](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24478684) by [Liarian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liarian/pseuds/Liarian). 



Eddie groaned, an excruciating headache cracking his brains. He could feel his eyes parched and his eyelids still glued by the rheum. His cell phone kept ringing insistent. Eddie picked it up, according to the numbers on the screen, it was four in the afternoon. He couldn't remember what time he had gone to sleep, but it couldn't be long before eleven. The phone came alive again. Anne's name made him feel guilty for a moment before hanging up. Eddie rolled over on the mattress, hiding his face against the pillow. It smelled musty.

"Eddie!" The doorbell rang insistently between Anne's screams on the other side of the door. “Open up!”

Eddie waited still on the bed holding his breath believing that if he didn't make a sound Anne would think he wasn't home.

"I know you're there!" Anne yelled knocking on the door so hard she seemed to want to knock it down.

"Comin’" Eddie stumbled against an empty bottle of Jack in his haste to finish off the noise that was going to make his head explode. "I'm still alive!" He spat, opening the door. "You have already done your good deed for the day. Go back to your wonderful life.”

"Eddie, you have us worried." Anne blocked the door with her own weight before he could close it.

"I'm fine," he muttered, desperate to refocus on his own misery. Anne didn’t understand. Eddie had no right to be okay. Venom had died to save him and what for? Eddie was a human disgrace. In his nightmares, he still saw specks of slimy mass fraying in midair, sparks of flame engulfing them until they disappeared. Eddie had been unable to do anything.

"Stop lying to yourself" Anne walked in without waiting for Eddie to invite her in, left a bag on the kitchen counter, and, as if she were at her own home, put the groceries in the fridge and cabinets: lettuce, tomatoes, water , milk, eggs, oranges.

"You shouldn't have-" Eddie lost the thread when he saw a Hershey's bar. The silence in his own head felt abhorrent when the realization hit that for a second he had expected to hear Vee.

"Eddie, I don't expect you to be okay. Just because he wasn't human doesn't mean you don't have the right to grieve. You're not the only one who misses him.” Anne hugged him tight, burying her face against his shoulder. Eddie's arms were still limp, his body completely disconnected from the thoughts that kept spinning in his head. "Take a shower while I gather all this up a little." And with a kiss on the cheek she pushed him into the bathroom.

Eddie barely recognized himself when he saw his reflection in the mirror. The pallor on his face was sickly. He was too thin, and the dark circles under his eyes too marked. He looked like a zombie, bloodshot eyes from sleeping too much or too little. He undressed, leaving his yellow shirt and underpants in a ball in a corner against the toilet.

Eddie turned on the faucet, letting the steam fog the mirror and tiles, leaving only a blurred reflection. Too hot water scalded his skin. Eddie increased the temperature even more but he didn’t feel anything. Anne was concerned. He knew Dan was concerned too, but Eddie couldn't get himself to care enough.

"Eddie?" Anne interrupted his thoughts. "Everything’s alright?"

Eddie turned off the tap. He didn’t remember how long he had been lost in his own thoughts. Time sometimes seemed to lose all its meaning.

"Sorry... Yeah," he replied, wrapping a towel around his waist and opening the door with his wet hair still stamped against his forehead.

Anne lost her breath for a moment, her gaze locked on his torso.

"I have to go back to work," she answered once, she looked like she just remembered that the air had to reach the lungs. "And answer your damn phone!" She screamed, closing the apartment door behind her.

Eddie stared at the space Anne had occupied a second before and sighed with exhaustion before dropping back onto the mattress. Maybe if he put enough effort into it he would suffocate and never wake up again.

He hadn't even gotten back to sleep. He felt the rough sheets against his skin. The air in the apartment was stale. The damp stain on the ceiling seemed to laugh at him. In some corners the paint had peeled off. Cracks ran down the ceiling, drawing black cobwebs. Maybe there was even mold between the walls, eating away at the almost non-existent insulation. The hours seemed to slip through his fingers. When he realized it, the sun was hiding among the skyscrapers, making the room dim. He had slept too much to fool his body again and the walls of the room felt as if they wanted to crush him. His anxiety only made it worse, feeling like hundreds of needles under his skin.

Eddie got up determined to escape those stifling walls. He opened the second drawer of the nightstand, looking for clean underpants. Just three days ago he had taken the last ones but he still had trouble remembering it. He slammed the drawer shut and rescued some jeans from the dirty clothes lying on the floor. They smelled musty, like everything in the apartment, and had a stain, he didn't even know of what, on the leg. His gray sweatshirt was still hanging on the back of one of the dining room chairs.

Eddie had kicked those streets hundreds of times but it was the first time he had stepped on them since Venom had died. Eddie leaned against the wall, overwhelmed by the thought of being alone in the midst of so many strangers. He looked around. The streetlights were already on but it couldn't be too late with so many people still on the street. Eddie drowned his thoughts, concentrating on the noise of the traffic. He just needed to get to the corner and back. Nothing was going to happen. He could say hello to Mrs. Cheng, buy Tater Tots, a Gatorade, and come back. Eddie started running, leaving his mind blank. Maybe if he ran long enough the anxiety wasn't going to hit him. Eddie ran and ran until he had blisters on his feet. He stopped abruptly trying to catch his breath.

“Hey! Look where you are going!” someone shouted as they collided with him.

Looking around, he realized he was in the middle of the Golden Gate, the San Francisco Bay under his feet. According to his cell phone, it was very early in the morning. Exhausted, he leaned against the railing, his gaze lost in infinity. How many yards would there be? He couldn't remember where he had read it, but from that height the crash into the water had to be like hitting the asphalt. At least that way, it would save Anne the horrible experience of finding his bleeding body in the bathtub. He just had to cross to the other side and jump. A moment of panic and it would all be over.

Even deadbeat, it didn't take long for him to jump the fence. The lights illuminating the bridge painted reflections against the water, creating ripples of reddish and gold colors against the darkness. Nothing kept him away from the abyss. Eddie closed his eyes, trying to control his terror. He just needed to let go and it would be over in a second.

 **"Eddie,"** a plaintive whimper crossed his thoughts. **"Eddie, we're sorry. We are here”** barely a thread of voice, imperceptible between the cries that overwhelmed him asking to end everything. **"Eddie, don't leave us."**

“Vee? Oh my God!” Eddie lost his balance. For a second, he was convinced that he was going to rush into the void. A shiny black claw held him suspended above the bay. His heart seemed to want to escape from his chest.

With effort, he lifted his own body until he was safe again. The adrenaline was still holding him tight and the needles of his anxiety seemed to be burning him. Eddie curled up, the bars digging into his back.

"I've missed you, damn parasite." He laughed hysterically through tears. "Don't ever do something like that to me again."

His hands trembled. His two hands, completely human. Eddie closed his eyes trying to notice the symbiote under his skin but nothing felt different. No trace of that electrifying sensation when the symbiote walked near the dermis, or the weight on the stomach when it was hidden inside his entrails.

“Vee, do you think you could-?”

 **"Too weak,"** the symbiote cut him off, muttering almost sleepily.

"Anne is going to kill me," Eddie dropped his head against the railing. Even at that hour, the San Francisco sky barely had stars. The chills continued to run through his body as the immensity of what he had been about to do began to settle in his mind. His fingers were barely able to coordinate enough to reach Anne's contact.

"Eddie?" Anne's voice slurred, still half asleep. "Do you know what time it is?"

"Anne... I've been about to do something stupid." Eddie didn't want to imagine what Anne's voice should sound like. "Do you think you could pick me up?"

"Eddie? Are you at home? How sober are you-”

"N-no... I’m S-sober." Eddie gripped the phone tightly. "At the Golden Gate. Sorry Anne.”

For an instant, he heard no noise on the other side of the conversation. Eddie looked at the screen of the phone, convinced that the call had been cut but Anne's name was still there, and below it the count of seconds kept going up. Anne didn’t hang up in the twenty minutes it took for Dan's car to double-park in front of him. Eddie looked up, eyes still red, the smell of salt invading his nose. The passenger door closed with a sharp knock and before he knew it, Anne's arms hugged him so tightly that he could hardly breathe.

Eddie didn't reply when the car parked in Anne's garage. The last thing he wanted was to be in his own apartment when Vee was still too weak to remind him that he wasn't alone. In his state, could Vee have survived? Eddie couldn’t silence the litany that he had been about to end both their lives.

"Everything is going to be fine." Anne stroked his face before forcing him to sit on the gray velvet sofa. Very chic and the most uncomfortable thing in the world. Eddie hated that sofa. He still remembered the discussions the day they had bought it.

Anne climbed the stairs. Eddie could hear the noise of cabinets opening and closing before he saw her come down again, with what had to be all the blankets in the house. Dan was in the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee filled the house.

"Thanks," Eddie smiled as he felt the weight of the blankets on his shoulders but was convinced it was just a grimace.

Anne sat next to him and turned on the TV, the background noise releasing the tension in the room. Vee was alive. The claw had been real. Or maybe he was going crazy and the voice had been nothing but his imagination.

 **"I'm still here, Eddie."** Vee interrupted his train of thought. The tears escaped from his eyes again. Anne snuggled against him on one side of the sofa and Dan on the other, offering him a cup of coffee. Eddie missed Vee's slimy touch against his skin. His whole being vibrated desperate to feel his embrace.

"You know you can talk to us" Dan clapped him on the shoulder. “We are not in the habit of judging.”

"I-I know." Eddie looked down at his hands, not wanting to have to look them in the face, knowing he was going to find an understanding he didn't deserve. “But I'm fine. I'm better. It was only a moment of weakness and I don’t-”

Eddie didn't say anything else. He didn’t think it would win him many points to admit that he didn’t regret having tried to end his life. Almost as a reflex, Eddie felt all the hair on his body stand on end. It was almost imperceptible, but the veins in his arms darkened, his symbiote so close to the surface that he could see it run through his body just below the dermis.

"Try to sleep" Anne got up kissing him on the forehead. The first rays of dawn crept through the curtains. "I have to go, but if you need anything, Dan has an afternoon shift."


	2. Chapter 2

"I hate you," Eddie answered right after picking up the phone with a grunt. "What time is it?" He asked, reaching out and looking for the alarm clock on the nightstand. It had to be somewhere under the mountain of empty cans, Twix wrappers, and used kleenex.

"Good morning to you too!" Anne's voice sounded too energetic so early in the morning.

"Anne, it's too early even for you." Eddie scratched his eyes convinced that the alarm clock had stopped during the night. The numbers marked five thirty-seven.

“My plane leaves in two hours.”

"The rest of us mortals have the right to sleep," Eddie grumbled. "What do you think will happen if one day you don't call?"

The silence on the other end could be cut with a knife. Eddie was suddenly awake, sleep completely forgotten.

“Shit, I’m sorry. I'm fine Anne. Seriously.” His suicide attempt was something they didn't talk about but it was still very present in all their interactions.

"Do you promise me?" The voice on the other end of the phone sounded terribly small.

"Boy Scout word." Eddie raised his arm in a military salute even though Anne couldn't see him.

"You've never been a Boy Scout, Eddie."

“How could you know?”

“I imagine that it would have come out in some conversation. I’ve to leave you, my taxi is already here. Talk to you tonight!”

Eddie threw himself on the bed, legs and arms spread out like a starfish. Three weeks had already passed, but Anne kept calling every morning and every night. At least he had managed to convince them that he needed his privacy or his kidneys would have ended up paying dearly for his stunt at the Golden Gate. Sleeping on that couch was torture. One night had been more than enough.

Eddie didn't bother trying to go back to sleep. He never did when anxiety gripped his stomach and tensed every muscle in his body.

**"Hungry"** Vee whimpered.

Eddie looked at his arms, his stomach, his thighs, even his feet, looking for that shadow that smudged his skin when the symbiote traveled its skin-deep veins or walked between the innermost layers of the epidermis. Maybe he had a favorite place to doze off when he disappeared deep inside him.

**"Your heart has quickened. You're Okay?"**

"Is that where you are right now?"

Vee muttered an affirmation. Any kind of interaction still seemed to cost him a lot of effort but during the day it was more common to feel him running through his body. Eddie's life hadn't changed much, but even the silence of the apartment had a different weight each time he noticed Vee's almost electric tickle.

"Pancakes?" He asked, sheathing himself in clean underpants and arranging his hair with his fingers. Maybe it was time to throw the bottles on the floor and empty the sink.

Eddie took the eggs, milk and butter out of the fridge and a chocolate bar with nuts. "It is Mary's recipe. They aren’t as good as hers but they are passable.”

Eddie continued speaking trying to fill the silence. His stomach responded with a roar to the smell of hot butter. The chocolate bar was on the counter and was falling ounce by ounce as the pancakes browned in the pan.

In a short time, twelve mushy pancakes piled on the plate dipped in chocolate syrup. Eddie sat on the couch in briefs and turned on the TV, the plate balancing on his thighs.

"I'm sure it's your fault that I'm eating my weight in chocolate," he grumbled, licking his syrup-stained fingers. “Yesterday we bought six tablets and we just finished the last one. You better appreciate the effort I put for you.”

Eddie felt stupid talking to the walls of his apartment when Vee was barely able to answer, but the shame was worth it when he noticed the slight purr near the nape of his neck.

“Oh! So I just needed to make pancakes to see you?” He laughed as he saw the jet trembling tendril escaping from his arm and crawling to the plate.

**"Hungry,"** Ve replied with a grunt, a slice of pancake disappearing under the slimy mass.

Little by little, Eddie's life seemed to be getting back into place. For the first time in days, Eddie was awake before Anne called him. He didn't want to delude himself, but the prospect of returning to work as an investigative journalist kept him in high spirits. He just needed the job interview to go well.

**"Hungry,"** Ve grumbled as Eddie pulled up his tapered pants with difficulty. The button was pressing too hard. Grumbling, he undressed and tried another one. Eddie looked at himself, tapping his flabby stomach with his finger. He was sure he shouldn't be able to sink it into the flesh.

**"Hungry"** the symbiote insisted on an infinite litany. Eddie frowned, clutching his stomach with his hands. It wasn't much, but there it was. Nothing worrying except for the pants that barely let him breathe when he sat down. Eddie undressed again, leaving his pants on the bed, and locked himself in the bathroom.

"Five pounds!" Eddie threw up his arms in exasperation when he saw the number on the weighing machine. “Five pounds! In a month! We are not pregnant, Vee! We shouldn’t have cravings! Chocolate is over!” The electrical tingling around the shoulder blades disappeared. Eddie sighed and stepped off the weighing machine. Sometimes talking to Vee was like arguing with a toddler. His reflection watched him from the mirror. The three-day beard was starting to scratch too much but at least he could tell he looked good. The color had returned to his face and his cheekbones were not sunken as if he were an ex-drug addict.

Resigned, he left his apartment, freshly shaved, in a pearl gray blazer and too uncomfortable pants. He was convinced that the shirt must have sweat marks on the armpits. The rush hour tram meant more people locked up in a confined space than they had had to endure in months. He was sure it was just paranoia, but Eddie had the impression they were being watched. He was glad he had grabbed his bluetooth helmets. At least they spared him unwanted conversations.

**"You are nervous. Why?"** In the past week, Vee had started talking more and sleeping much less. Although it was still rare to see the symbiote's more physical manifestations, the tickling sensation had become a constant.

"I don't have the best references in the business," Eddie sighed, wiping his free hand on his pants leg. “This may be my only chance and I don't want to screw it up.”

**"We saved the world, what other references do you need?"** Vee asked puzzled.

"I suppose you're right." Eddie laughed. "Shame no one can know. We shouldn’t have to worry about referrals again.”

**"Humans are stupid."** Vee replied with aplomb.

"Humans need money too," Eddie missed his sweatshirt. The pockets of the jacket weren’t deep enough to hide his hands. He jumped down from the tram. At least he no longer had to put up with strangers' breath against his neck.

Eddie breathed a sigh of relief when he finally closed the door to his apartment behind him. Without looking, he left the jacket lying on one of the chairs and took two cans of beer from the fridge. Unbuttoning his pants button, he dropped onto the couch. The interview had gone well. He drank the first can of beer almost in one gulp, and it didn't take him long to open the second one too. His back hurt. The bitter taste on the palate almost made it work as a placebo, decompressing the tension of the day even before the alcohol could have had no effect. Distracted, he stroked his stomach, where he felt Vee's tickle. The tendrils began to swirl between his fingers.

"It was a good day." Eddie played with the amorphous mass on his lap. “I've missed you.”

**"Eddie is a good host."** Vee purred, curled up on his lap like a cat, and looked up at him with his huge opaline eyes.  **"We like your stomach"**

"I knew it!" Eddie replied feigning outrage. "You've been stuffing me!"

Vee closed his eyes again, his purrings of satisfaction echoing louder and louder. Eddie took another swig of his beer, finishing the second can. The landline phone broke the instant. Eddie turned his face, looking at the device as if it had offended him but didn't bother moving from the couch. The phone went silent for a second and rang again. Eddie picked it up, convinced it was going to be a telemarketer.

"Eddie?"

The voice on the other end of the phone chilled his blood. He was convinced that he would never have to hear it again. But there was Eddie, standing in the middle of his apartment trembling because his father had spoken his name.

"You have the wrong number, sorry," he replied without any inflection in his voice.

"Eddie, I know it's you."

Eddie hung up before his father could say anything else. Almost like an automaton, he took two more cans of beer from the fridge and sank back onto the sofa. He almost expected some comment from Vee but the symbiote just curled up on his shoulders.

Eddie was still lying on the couch hours later. The world was spinning and he was convinced that if he tried to stand up he would fall flat on his face. The headache ran down to the bridge of his nose and his eyes were puffy. At the time, binging on all the alcohol in his apartment had seemed like a good idea. Right now, all he knew was that it had been stupid. When he finally managed to stay on his feet, he walked slowly with his hand against the wall. The beer cans were lying on the couch and another bottle of Jack Daniel’s had been added to the dozen that decorated the apartment.

"Vee, can't you do something with the hangover?" He asked the fourth time he had to bend down to pick up a glass bottle left on the floor.

**"I thought it was another human experience you didn't want me to mess with."** Vee's voice boomed inside his head.

"Can you do something or not?" Eddie grumbled.

**"I can,"** he replied, satisfied with himself.

"And are you going to?"

**"No"**

Eddie sighed resignedly, gobbling up two ibuprofen dry. Vee and alcohol had a very particular relationship. The symbiote hated anything that might hinder their senses, and the hangover was his way of punishing him for endangering them. Another one of those things that made humans stupid. Somehow, he deserved it. It had been almost twenty years since he had seen his father. Enough time had passed to be able to handle a call without drowning everything in alcohol. 

Eddie stopped in front of the phone and picked up the receiver. The line gave tone. Maybe he should have listened to him. His father would never have called if it wasn't important. Eddie slammed down the phone before the answering machine messages could begin.

**"Eddie?"** Vee settled on his shoulders, his serpentine form curled against his neck.

"It’s Okay, don't worry." Eddie slammed his forehead against the wall, trying to control his breathing. "I just hoped I didn't have to think about my father again."

**"We can always eat him"** The ease with which Vee spoke of devouring people still throwed him for a spin.  **"He wouldn't call any more."**

"A bit of a drastic solution, don't you think?" Eddie laughed. "Maybe I shouldn't have hung up on him. What if he is dying?”

**"He will stop making calls that flood your blood flow with neuropsin."**

“It isn’t so easy. He’s still my father and I don't know-” Eddie sat back on the couch, hiding his face behind the palms of his hands. "What if he wants to fix things? Maybe we deserve the opportunity to forgive each other.”

**"Maybe"** Ve seemed to be pondering his words.  **"And if not, we can always find out if your liver and theirs taste very different."**

"We always have that option," Eddie dragged Vee from his shoulders to his chest and hugged him tight.

  
  


Carl Brock had become in a few days a shadow that haunted him every minute. It didn't matter if he was having lunch with Anne and Dan in a Bistro or shopping in the supermarket. After years without doing it, he had begun to bite his nails compulsively, to the point of injuring his fingers. The pain lasted only an instant, Vee closed the cuts almost before his brain registered them. Calling his father was becoming a necessity if he didn't want to go crazy. Hope was a motherfucker. As long as he didn't call, there was a chance things might go well, but Eddie knew that wasn’t going to happen.

He had been in bed for hours, but his thoughts kept him awake. In the utter silence, the sound of a car skidding around the corner too fast resounded throughout the street. Lying on his back, Eddie watched the ceiling of his room in the dark. It was strange to think that the only thing keeping his anxiety at bay was knowing that Vee was willing to devour his father if necessary. Eddie turned, snuggling under the covers. Vee was curled up on the pillow, a shapeless mass of shiny black. Even at night, his symbiote used to keep some part of its body visible.

"I don't think I've ever thanked you for saving me."

**“You are ours, Eddie. We will do whatever it takes to protect you,”** he whispered, adopting his serpentine form and opening his eyes. They sparkled in the darkness of the room as if they were made of white quartz.

“I know. But I wanted to tell you.” Two fingers stroked the shapeless mass. Eddie reached out in offering. The tendrils curled between his fingers.

Eddie was a human disaster condemned to always be alone. Anne had been a miracle in herself. It wasn’t a surprise when things ended the way they had. Eddie fucked up everything good in his life. In Vee's case, he was unable to find enough words to explain what having him in his life meant. Perhaps he was too greedy hoping that his father had some affection in store for him.

"Sorry I'm just a loser," he muttered half asleep.

**“You are our loser. We saved the world for you.”** The slimy mud strands ran slowly over his skin until he was wrapped in a hug. His arms, his entire belly, and part of his thighs were a mass of bright, intense black. 

When Eddie woke up, Vee was still hugging his body. His father's love couldn’t keep being like Schrödinger's cat, virtually existing as long as he did not open that box. Eddie took a deep breath. He picked up the phone, trembling hands dialing number after number. He cracked when there were only the last number left.

Vee had completely enveloped him until only his face was exposed. Eddie made himself a coffee and scrubbed the dishes that were piling up in the sink.

"It's just a phone call," he yelled, picking up the receiver again. The line was working, but Eddie was frozen. He was about to hang up again when the answering machine clicked. According to the mechanical voice he had a new message. Eddie heard the date of the message: two days after the failed call. By the time he reacted, his father's voice began to speak. His icy tone was exactly the same as he remembered from his childhood. The recording had been talking for a while when Eddie finally began to pay attention to the words.

"You are as selfish as you have always been. You turn your back on us when it's your fault that we find ourselves in this situation. The bank will take-” the receiver slipped through his fingers and hit the cabinet. Eddie hung up slamming the receiver down, unable to hear the rest of the message.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be aware of the new Tags!!!

Eddie already knew the message on the answering machine by heart. He had been about to delete it dozens of times but always found one reason or another for not doing it. He didn’t even remember what time it was when he had finally fallen asleep, but the first lights of dawn broke on the horizon.

"You could have woken me up," he grumbled when he realized that none of Anne's twenty-six missed calls had managed to wake him up. The phone began to vibrate against the wood of the nightstand. “Why is my phone silent?!”

 **"You needed to sleep,"** Vee replied, opening one eye and not bothering to move from the pillow.

"Thank you very much, Vee!" He blurted out knowing what was waiting for him as soon as he picked up the phone. "Anne, I'm sorry." Eddie felt himself blushing “Bad night. I haven't heard the phone.”

"Do you know how many times we've called you?" Anne yelled. "I was about to call the police! And to all the hospitals in the city! What were you thinking? You can't keep disappearing-”

"It was just a bad night, it's not like I was going to," Eddie complained. He didn't need to add any more shit to his conscience.

"And how should I know? You could at least try to think about us!” Anne snapped.

“I'm fine! How many times do I have to repeat myself? I'm fine!! I don't need you to remind me too that I am such a selfish person that I only know how to think about myself!”

 **"Anne only cares about you."** Eddie glared at Vee. He didn't need his opinion when it was his fault that he was having that discussion with Anne.

Vee sank into his insides, where Eddie couldn't feel his weight on his shoulders or the tickle under his skin. Desperate he tried to stifle a scream against the pillow. As if that wasn't enough, he now also had an offended symbiote.

"Sorry," Eddie sighed, "I'm fine, I promise. It's just… Carl… Carl called.” Eddie got out of bed and started pacing the apartment trying to calm down.

“Carl? Your father?” Anne's voice hardened with the same tone that she only used in court “What does that wretch want now?”

"What do you think?" His laughter sounded unhinged. “Money.”

"Aren't you thinking of giving it to him, are you?"

"After the accident, I owe it to him. If it wasn't for me, he wouldn't have had to re-mortgage the house… I can't-”

“You were only seventeen and he left you on the streets! You don't owe him anything.” Anne cut him off again.

"He's still my father." Eddie dropped onto the couch trying to make himself as small as possible. "But I don't know where I'm going to get it from. It's not like I have that amount available right now.”

“How much are we talking about?”

“Twenty grand.”

"It's a lot of money," Anne sighed. "Are you sure that's what you want?"

"Anne, I can't leave him on the street. That would be lowering myself to the same level. At least let me believe that I'm better than him.”

“Eddie, it is impossible that you are like your father. You have a huge heart. It is very easy to love you. I don't think many other people would have accepted an alien into their life like you did. Venom saved humanity because you were part of it.”

"I guess sometimes I still need to be reminded." Eddie watched the tiny tendrils form around his wrists and wrapping his fingers

 **"We'll tell you as many times as it takes,"** Vee's voice boomed in his head. Eddie stroked Vee’s face, the symbiote’s gelatinous touch tickling his cheek. He pressed his black fingers to his lips without letting the small gesture turn into a kiss.

"Twenty grand... If that's what you need, okay," Anne sighed.

Anne, as efficient as ever, had ensured Eddie had the money deposited in his account twenty-four hours later. He no longer had any more excuses to continue delaying the call that had haunted him for almost two weeks. Eddie picked up the receiver and dialed the number trying to blank his mind. The seconds seemed to stretch infinitely for each tone.

"Hello?" His father's voice sounded tired on the other side. "Hello?" The old man insisted irritably.

Eddie was frozen for a second, unable to speak.

"Do you still need the money?" Eddie snapped.

"Not too bad," Carl answered ironically, "two weeks to return a call.”

"Do you need it or not?"

"Do you think I would have called if I had any other choice?" His father growled. "I've seen you on the news. I'm surprised someone believes your tales. You’re still the same as always, dragging the good name of exemplary people through the mud-”

"My tales are going to save you from being evicted." Eddie clenched his fists tightly until his fingers tickled. "Are you sure you want to keep going that way?"

“You’ll always be the same. Do you need my bank account number?”

“I have a check ready. If you're going to accept my money, you can at least do so by looking me in the face.” Eddie hung up hitting the receiver hard. He could hear his breathing going too fast. The thought of seeing his father again made his stomach churn. "Vee, I think I did something stupid."

Vee wrapped him in his jet mass prepared to defend him from any threat. His hands, his arms, his chest, his entire body was a black stained canvas but there was nothing to protect him from when the enemy was his own mind. His thoughts went into a spiral that seemed to want to gobble him up.

"Someday you will regret joining such a pathetic host," Eddie laughed desperately. "Don't blame me when you realize it."

**"Eddie, we already know you're pathetic. You force us to take elevators, you don't let us eat all the chocolate we want, you forbid us to try new things ”**

"We weren't going to eat the neighbor's iguana!" Eddie replied indignantly.

 **"Irrelevant."** The Lovecraftian face formed from his chest, with his shark smile. The opaline eyes looked at him with overwhelming intensity. **“We know who you are and we choose you. You are ours.”**

It was three in the morning and Eddie had long assumed that this was going to be another blank night. Maybe there was still time to send the money to his father and forget everything. It wasn’t worth torturing himself with memories that were buried in the storage room of his memory to earn a petty revenge.

"Vee," he whispered, scared of his own voice, "I need you to promise me one thing." He couldn't stop looking at his hands. It was as if they were covered in tar. The black pitch began to fray near his chest, forming the symbiote's face. “Tomorrow… It doesn't matter what happens-”

 **"Why are you scared? We are not going to let anything happen to you”** Vee growled showing all his teeth.

"How much can you see from my memories?" Eddie closed his eyes as he felt a chill run down his spine. He could still feel the shadow of hands that hadn't touched him in years. The idea of Vee looking at his memories as if they were just another chapter of Eddie Brock: The Movie made his stomach turn.

 **"We can read electrical impulses and process some of the information they contain. The same as with the rest of your thoughts.”** Eddie felt himself blushing with a shame that wasn’t his. **"Sometimes we pick up snippets, but it's easier to get information from the flavors of your neurotransmitters."**

"And just for that you already hate my father?" Eddie frowned.

Vee squeezed him against his newly formed chest and wrapped him in a hug. Eddie could feel his claws on his back. **"The first time he called and this afternoon... The taste of your neurotransmitters was bitter. We hate that flavor."**

“Carl is harmless. But there are things I'd rather be able to forget” Eddie lifted his face, the symbiote's infinite tongue just inches from his lips. "Promise me you won't do anything drastic."

Vee purred without replying. Eddie closed his eyes and let the sound lull him to sleep. The viscous touch of the symbiote erased the memories on his skin.

Eddie parked his Kawasaki Ninja on the sidewalk, removing his helmet without much ceremony. 960 Oak Street had not changed much since the last time he had been there. A staircase led to the entrance, at the height that for the rest of the houses on the street was the second floor.

"Well, we're here," he sighed, wishing he could be Venom in that instant.

 **"We are always Venom"** the symbiote's voice boomed in his head as small, almost imperceptible strands began to stain his clothes giving them an appearance that resembled leather.

The knot in his stomach seemed to be made of barbed wire when he finally rang the bell. At another time, this had to have been a happy house but in his memories it only existed as a mausoleum consecrated to his mother.

Eddie didn't know what to expect when his father finally opened the door. The man seemed to have shrunk in the last twenty years. There was hardly a trace of the imposing man, always clad in a pristine suit. It was as if time had consumed him, leaving only a living corpse. His eyes were sickly yellowish and sank into his lean face. Eddie took a deep breath trying to get his thoughts in order.

 **"If you change your mind, he could still serve as a snack,"** Vee purred, the sound wiping away the last traces of anxiety. Eddie shook his head in disbelief, trying not to laugh. **"You can't blame us, we haven't had breakfast."**

"You've come," his father blocked his path with a grimace on his face.

"Is it little Edward?" Someone yelled in the dim light of the hall. Against the light he recognized the figure of Father Dawson.

"What's he doing here?" Eddie stepped back, stumbling over one of the front steps. "I don’t" he gripped the railing tightly.

"I don't need you to put on one of your shows." His father shot him a look. "It was you who insisted on coming."

"Carl, don't be so hard on the boy," Father Dawson interrupted them. Its hooked appearance was reminiscent of the Nosferatu of classic cinema. His predatory smile froze Eddie’s insides. "Last time I saw you, you were still a brat."

"Don't touch me," Eddie snapped, pulling his arm away. His heart was beating like crazy and he was having trouble breathing.

"Don't be like that," the man reached out his hand again, direct to his shoulder. Eddie shuddered, cornered against the railing.

 **"He told you not to touch him,"** Vee's voice boomed in the morning silence. A huge hand with sharp claws caught the priest's arm. The image must be Dantesque, Eddie's face deformed with the symbiote's shark smile and the shadow of his opaline eyes.

"Demon!" Father Dawson yelled scared.

Carl hid at home, closing the door behind him. Eddie was sure that right now his father was calling the police.

 **"Coward,"** Venom growled.

Eddie disappeared surrounded by a dozen tentacles. Venom picked up the old pervert, grabbing him by the neck. Eddie had yet to get used to the feeling of being just a passenger in his own body. Father Dawson was kicking, trying to keep his feet on the ground.

 **"Can we eat this one?"** Venom licked the priest’s cheek with his sharp tongue. Father Dawson's face had been riveted in terror.

"Let him go!" He tried to scream. He didn’t know how many people could be watching them, but it was easy to imagine that if someone was recording them the images wouldn’t take long to end on some site. "Vee, we have to go"

“Oh my God!” the man pissed on himself “Please…”

"Vee, please, we have to go." Eddie wasn't sure if the symbiote could hear him. Terror began to cloud his thoughts. The memories of Father Dawson caressing him under the shirt and sliding his hand down sinking into his shorts overlapped with the panic of losing Vee again. Eddie was sure that as soon as he regained control of his body he would vomit. The old memories of his abuse emerged after years trying to bury them deep in his mind. "Don’t do this to me." Eddie pleaded. "Please, I don't want to lose you because of scum like Father Dawson."

 **"We won't let anyone come between us."** Venom dropped Father Dawson's unconscious body. Neighbors watched from behind the windows. The hateful sound of sirens echoed too close.

Eddie was shivering when Vee finally sank down into his gut. Without ceremony, he took the envelope out of his pocket and, balancing so as not to step on the unconscious man on the landing, he slipped it under the door.

"With this we are even," he murmured, turning away from the house that for years had been his private hell.


	4. Chapter 4

The keys clanged against the wood when Eddie left them on the table along with the bike's helmet. Without looking, he left the jacket on, not bothering to hang it, and undressed, leaving a trail of clothing following him to the bathroom. He couldn't bear another second the touch of the clothing against his skin. He turned on the faucet, the pressure at full blast, and let the steam fog the mirror. He wasn't able to look at his own reflection before he got into the tub, the boiling water burning his back. The blotches barely lasted an instant against his skin, before Venom took it upon himself to heal them over and over again.

Eddie stifled a scream. All he wanted was to rip his skin to shreds until Father Dawson's feeling against his naked body disappeared completely. His stomach flipped and he needed to lean, his hand against the tiles, to keep his balance. The aftertaste of puke rose to his mouth and it didn't take long to empty the contents of his stomach. Eddie dropped to his knees, his hair flattened against his forehead, the drops sliding down his face. The water dragged the dirt down and clogged the drain.

"Fuck" he whimpered, picking up the leftover half-digested food and got up with difficulty. His legs barely supported him. Eddie felt Vee's weight against his shoulders.

"Vee, don’t" Eddie tried to avoid it but in a second, the symbiote's tongue had engulfed the regurgitated remains. "God, that’s gross. Did you have to eat it?”

**"We're hungry, Eddie."** Eddie felt Vee's weight against his shoulders. The symbiote had taken his serpentine form and was watching him. Eddie couldn't help but feel judged.  **"Eddiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie, we're hungry,"** he whimpered  **"You’re trying to starve us."**

"You're a bottomless pit" Eddie sighed, turning off the tap and wrapping the towel around his waist. He didn't bother getting dressed before sitting on the couch. He felt the fabric cling to his still damp body. "Thank you," he smiled, stroking the tendril nestled against his neck.

Vee looked at him feigning ignorance before stretching his body out like gum until he reached the kitchen cabinets.

**"There's no chocolate left,"** he complained, gobbling up the last bar.  **"Anne will want to know how it went"**

"You think we could keep between us running into Father Dawson?" Eddie gripped his knees tightly, digging his nails.

**"Why?"** Vee narrowed his eyes. The tendrils contracted to just inches from Eddie's face again.  **"You feel ashamed."**

“We should let the past rest when it no longer matters. It was a long time ago.” Eddie got up and retrieved a beer from the fridge. He needed to run away from awkward questions, but with the symbiote there was nowhere to hide.

**"You had a panic attack not even ten minutes ago"** Vee tried to steal the beer from his hands.

"I don't want to talk about it," he snapped, raising the one arm he had the can gripped.

**"We have no secrets, Eddie"**

“Everybody has secrets! We are talking about my life. Mine! It has nothing to do with you!” He shouted.

Vee bristled like a cat before completely disappearing into his body.

"If that's what you want to play, fine!" Eddie shut himself in his room slamming the door. "As if I cared!”

Maybe one day Eddie would decide that alcohol wasn’t a solution to his problems, but that day was still far away. Eddie crawled into Mrs. Chen's store. The bell rang as soon as the door was opened. The last thing he wanted was to leave the house, but there was hardly anything left in the fridge.

"You look worse than two days ago," Mrs. Chen looked at him closely.

"And you are as charming as ever," he tried to smile, but Vee's silence was like a slab against his chest.

“Problems with the roommate?”

"You know how it goes," Eddie shrugged.

Eddie wandered through the hallways without making up his mind. Vee seemed determined to win their stubbornness competition. Eddie grabbed a bag of frozen tater tots and another six-pack of beer. He stood in front of the sweets front and took a giant bag of M & M’s.

"Black or milk?" He asked when he reached for the chocolate bars. "At least you could try to understand me," he growled when it became clear that Vee wasn't going to answer. "Do you need me to beg?" Is that it?” Eddie complained frustrated.

Eddie put the basket case down on the counter with a thud. Mrs. Chen looked at the contents with an eyebrow raised but she didn’t say anything. It was obvious what she was thinking. Next to the magazines, a man stared at him.

"Something on my face?" He growled as he passed him.

His bad mood seemed to color everything. Even the sky seemed to share his mood, with black clouds darkening the day. Eddie rescued one of the beers he had just bought and finished it in two gulps. Vee had decided that if they didn't talk about Father Dawson they weren't going to talk at all. Perfect, because then there was no need to say anything. Eddie crushed the can between his fingers and tossed it in the nearest trash can.

Upon returning home, not even alcohol managed to make the silence between the four walls of his apartment less oppressive. His mind was going a thousand an hour. All he wanted was not to be there. Eddie opened the closet, rummaging through the shirts. The white one had to be clean, he hadn't worn it in months and had always liked how the tribal tattoos looked when he was wearing it. It took him a while to find it, cornered at the bottom of the drawer. When he tried it on, it was a little narrower than he remembered, but with the leather jacket on, it was not going to matter. Eddie looked at himself in the mirror one last time, giving his hair a few final touches before picking up the keys and heading down the stairs two at a time.

The engine of his Kawasaki roared in the silence of the night. Eddie didn't bother putting on his helmet. The streets were quiet at that time of the morning. His military boots stepped on the accelerator until the streetlights were nothing more than lines of light on the horizon.

Eddie stepped off the bike in an almost perfect personification of James Dean, with the silver chain hanging from the pocket of his dark pants. Eddie left the clubs behind, with their VIP lists and lines of people waiting to go in.

The waiter at the Saint George greeted him as soon as he sat down at the bar. Eddie ordered a Bourbon, too sober for his liking. The atmosphere was lively at that time. Saint George had everything Vee hated. Alcohol, noise and people. But pubs like that were a good hunting ground. Eddie finished his Bourbon in one gulp.

"You had to decide to add to everything that has gone wrong today." Thinking of Vee made his mood sour. All he wanted was to forget everything for a moment.

With the second Bourbon between his fingers, he leaned his elbows against the bar and looked at the groups of people talking and laughing. Eddie smiled realizing that one of the girls at the back was watching him. Her almost white blonde hair contrasted with the pink streak in her bangs. It was impossible not to see her, in the middle of the crowd. The woman looked away, a slight blush on her cheeks. It was a bad idea, but Eddie got up, leaving the empty glass on the bar and with his hands in his pockets came closer.

"Would you mind some company?" He continued smiling when the woman raised her face. After the day he had had, all he wanted was to stop feeling like the scared kid his father had branded as a liar.

"It's a free country." The woman shrugged, returning the smile.

"Can I buy you a drink?" Eddie dropped into the chair. The girl had to be ten years his junior. Eddie couldn't stop looking at her. Her eyes reminded him of Annie's. "Eddie," he said, offering her his hand.

"Melissa," under the table, Eddie noticed the woman's leg invading his space.

Things seemed to be going well. After the first drink, they had ordered a second while the conversation flowed between them. Eddie listened to her, unable to tear his gaze from her lips. Melissa was an activist and volunteered at a juvie center.

"All they need is for someone to give them a chance." Her hands never stopped still as she talked about her boys. "It helps to know that someone cares."

"They are lucky to have you." Eddie couldn't stop thinking about where he wanted to see those lips.

Melissa licked her lips. Was she a screamer in bed? He wasn’t the one-night stands type but it was a better option than drinking until he passed out.

Before he knew it, Eddie was kneeling in one of the bar's toilets, Melissa's panties on the floor and Eddie's tongue on her clit.

"God, don’t stop," Melissa moaned as Eddie's fingers sank into her wetness and his tongue circled faster and faster. Eddie could feel Melissa's nails digging into his scalp, keeping it right where she wanted him.

**"Eddie, what are you doing?"** Eddie ignored the symbiote's comment, his erection hardly having room in his pants.  **"Eddiiiie?"** Vee insisted again.  **"Eeeddie!"** The symbiote's electrical tickling against his pelvis made him lose his rhythm. He could feel the black slime tendrils under his clothes.  **"You don't have to lower yourself to being her bitch."**

"Shut up!!" he yelled, any arousal ripped out. Melissa looked at him confused. "Fuck" he moaned as he knocked on the door blocking his exit. His hands trembled as he removed the latch. "I-I have to go."

The cubicle door clanked as it slammed shut behind him. Eddie escaped, cursing his symbiote. He desperately needed to feel the cold night air.

"You had no right to interfere! What we were doing was between her and me,” he growled once he felt safe with the noise of the bar hiding his conversation.

**"As we couldn’t intrude when Drake's minions attacked us in our apartment! Or when the terror left you paralyzed when you saw Father Dawson?”** Vee's voice boomed in his head.

"It has nothing to do with it!" Eddie threw up his arms in exasperation as soon as he stepped onto the street. "I just wanted to feel normal for one night!"

**"You're ours,"** Vee growled, his anger pissing off Eddie.

“Now I'm ours! I don’t think so! There is no Us when you decide to ignore me!” Eddie yelled enraged. People leaving the bar stared at him but he didn’t care what they thought. "I needed you this afternoon but things had to be what you wanted and" Eddie stopped dead in the middle of the street and sighed, hiding his face behind the palm of his hand. "You don't even understand why I'm angry."

**"You don't let us understand"** the voice sounded tremendously small.

"Let's go home." Eddie took the bike keys from his pocket, completely defeated.

The roar of the engine silenced any other thoughts. For a second, there was nothing else in the world, just Eddie and the four hundred pounds of metal between his legs.

As he crossed the Golden Gate, Eddie stopped the bike in the middle of the highway and without much effort dragged it until it was parked in the ditch. The sky was beginning to lighten across the bay. Eddie leaned against the railing and watched the sea. The wind blew hard, the smell of salt filling his senses. At that exact point he had been about to end it all. If he looked closely, he could still see the marks of Venom's claws tearing at the steel bars. Sometimes it was difficult to remember his life before Carlton Drake crossed his path.

**"You regret finding us,"** Vee's voice whispered, interrupting his thoughts.

"What? No!" Eddie winced, unable to understand how he had been able to forget that Vee was still there. “I'm still mad at you but I don’t”

**"It is our fault that you cannot have a normal life"** The jet strands escaped from his shoulders forming the strange face of the symbiote. His opaline eyes stared at him.

"If I hadn't found you, chances are we were all dead," Eddie replied, gripping the rail.

**"I’m sorry Eddie."**

“For what? Having interrupted the only good thing that has happened to me all day?” Eddie crossed his arms “You'd better.”

**"We did not know what to do. Even with all the alcohol, the taste of your anxiety was disgusting.”**

"Sometimes it helps. When—” Eddie gestured with his hands trying to convey everything his words were unable to say. “Even when I feel horrible afterwards, if it's something I've been able to choose… It helps.”

**"We hate Father Dawson,"** Vee growled.

"You can stand in line." His lips twisted into a manic smile. "It doesn't matter what happens, it doesn't matter how angry you make me, I care about you. You know that, right?”

**"Enough to want to remain Venom?"** Vee watched with interest the seagulls that flew over them.

"Enough to want to stay here, with you."


	5. Chapter 5

Eddie was crouched in the shadows as two men argued in what sounded like Russian. They counted at least ten armed men on the dock. Eddie pulled out his cell phone, ready to take photos of whatever had been smuggled in on the boat that had just moored.

The first girl went down the runway. She trembled and black tear streaks stained her cheeks. Eddie zoomed in before shooting. Five more girls followed in very similar states. The photos came out a little shaken, his heart a thousand an hour. Eddie crawled over trying to get a better angle.

**"Bad people?"** Vee asked, his excitement running down his back like an electric current.

"Very bad," Eddie replied, putting his cell phone in his pocket. The symbiote purred, enveloping Eddie's body.

With a leap, Venom roared as he landed in front of the group of men guarding the unloading. A hail of bullets echoed in the silence of the night accompanied by screams of terror as the first trafficker fell limp, his skull still cracking between the symbiote's jaws.

The smell of blood invaded the environment. One of his arms extended to form a spear. Three men flew through the air. The bullets sank into the slimy mass that was his body, then plummeted to the ground a second later.

Venom pierced through a hell of bullets until he reached the two men flanking the runway. They seized the first one, their claws digging into flesh. The man was trying to break free. The tendons in his neck were ripped like paper in an almost perfect representation of Goya's painting.

One after another, the traffickers fell until the spectacle around them was a real slaughter. The six girls were still crouched on the runway. The smell of pee and vomit was overwhelming. Choppy sobs accompanied the sound of the waves.

**"We defended you from the bad guys."** Venom smiled proudly showing his shark teeth.

The sobs turned to tears of terror.

"Let's go, Vee." Eddie insisted, noting the confusion of his symbiote.

Venom climbed in two jumps to the roof of a nearby building. His body glided like a panther in the night, running and leaping between buildings as if the city belonged to him.

**"They are afraid of us."** Venom looked at the lights around him, the Golden Gate presiding over the panorama. Eddie felt the cold air against his cheeks, the mass of the symbiote huddled somewhere in his insides.

"It's complicated," Eddie walked away from the edge of the roof, noticing the cold sweat on his back and laid down on the ground, "No matter what we do, there will always be someone who considers us the bad guy. Eating people... It's hard to argue that’s what “ _ good guys” _ do” Eddie drew the quotes with his hands.

There were hardly any stars in the sky, but even so, the view was beautiful. Vee wasn’t an assassin, just a predator. Who would blame the lion for eating a gazelle? Vee wasn't even human but if the bodies started to pile up someone would start asking questions.

After the visit to his father, Eddie had lived in a state of permanent alert, convinced that at any moment, in some dark corner of the internet, images of Venom would begin to appear. If someone had recorded them in broad daylight it would be too easy to identify Eddie. Without being mega famous, people sometimes recognized him on the street. His father had seen Venom. And also Father Dawson. Maybe fear would keep them quiet, but for how long? Eddie sighed. A month had passed and nothing had happened. Maybe Eddie had the problem thinking that ending a gang of drug dealers was the closest thing to a date with Vee.

"Can I ask you a question?" Eddie reached up and opened his palm, looking up at the sky between his fingers. “The kiss. In the woods. We have never discussed it.”

**"That is not a question."**

“You know what I mean! A kiss can mean many things and I don't know if” the words got stuck in his throat “Are we together?”

**“We're always together, Eddie. It's a stupid question”**

“No, I mean… I care about you and”

**"I know. It's not the first time you say it."** Vee growled in exasperation.  **“You taste of anxiety. Why?"**

"Because you live in my body but that doesn't mean!" Eddie sat up leaning against the brick wall. "Leave it, it doesn't matter."

**"We are Venom."**

“Yes, I know. Spawn of hell, huge. Out of a Lovecraft novel.”

**"You are an idiot."** The symbiote formed its most humanoid form, its torso merging with Eddie's body at its waist. The symbiote's sharp tongue ran down his neck, lingering in the corner behind his ear. Eddie felt a chill, convinced that Vee was going to devour him. His claws traced the contour of his chest. It was as if his entire body was on fire, his breath hitting and his heart pounding. Before he knew it, the symbiote's tongue invaded his throat. He could hardly think. Eddie whimpered, all the blood between his legs.

**"Answer enough?"** Vee pressed him against his chest, his arms melting into the skin of Eddie’s back.

Eddie let his mind wander, feeling safe in the symbiote's arms. For a second, all the terror of the past few days seemed not to matter.

It was almost ten in the morning when they finally got home. Eddie crawled up the stairs to his landing. He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. The door to his apartment was open, and TV noises were coming from the dining room. Eddie turned the knob trying not to make noise. As he crossed the threshold, Venom didn't let the stranger react before pinning him against the wall.

"Hi Vee!" Dan greeted, his face reddened from the lack of air. The symbiote dropped him, his mass hiding again inside Eddie's body. Dan massaged his neck and wrists and took a deep breath. "I suppose that explains things."

"What are you doing here?" Eddie put the keys on the table and opened the fridge. There were only beers. With a sigh, he closed it again and filled a glass with tap water. “Want something?”

Dan shook his head.

"You didn't answer," Dan said, following him with his eyes, still standing in the middle of the dining room.

"Shit, I'm sorry," Eddie took the phone out of his pocket, the battery almost exhausted and the airplane mode still on. A dozen notifications began to add and in a moment he had ten missed calls and forty-seven texts.

"I'm glad you're alright." Dan pulled on his jacket, hung up his briefcase, "Call Annie!" and just closed the door.

**"Bye, Dan!"** Vee screamed using Eddie's lips.

"He's a very strange guy." Eddie stared at the door for a long time, listening to Dan walking away.

**"We like him,"** Vee purred.  **"Shame, we could eat him and get Annie back"**

"I don't think Annie would ever forgive us if we ate Dan." Eddie shrugged. With the last battery line, he sent Anne a text before falling exhausted on the mattress, dead to the world.

  
  


Kneeling in the confessional, Eddie could feel himself gasping for breath. His lip still stung where his father had split it. That had been the first and last time Carl had raised his hand. Eddie hadn't contradicted him again every time he called him a liar. It hadn't taken long for Eddie to learn to swallow his tears as the Christ on the cross watched impassively under his watchful eyes. Jesus was supposed to have died to forgive all sins, but perhaps those depraved acts were his penance for being born a murderer.

Eddie ran away from the confessional. The voices of the congregation repeated the words empty of meaning as the Virgin Mary cried tears of blood each time Father Dawson raised the communion wafer and blessed it with the devil's hands.

"Where do you think you're going, Eddie?" Mary grabbed him by the shirt and knocked him off balance. There were no eyes, no nose, no mouth on that face. Eddie looked at the rest of the people, filling the church pews. All of them, faceless monsters.

Father Dawson dragged him to the altar. Eddie was screaming and kicking, but his body was too small and Father Dawson too large. With his giant hand, he laid him down on the altar as a ritual sacrifice. Everyone looked at him and laughed and Eddie couldn't stop crying as Father Dawson unbuttoned his shirt, the old man’s hands running over his bare skin. Eddie screamed desperately but nobody did anything. They just laughed and laughed. Panic kept him immobilized against the frozen marble.

Father Dawson pounced on him, catching his lips between his teeth. Disgust churned his stomach. So many nights had started with a kiss like that and he didn't want… He couldn't after so many years. He had managed to escape, he was no longer a helpless child. His hands became brilliant black claws and sank into Father Dawson's throat. Blood oozed from the still hot wound and stained his fingers.

Eddie woke up suddenly, wrapped like a caterpillar in a black tar shell. The alarm clock said six in the afternoon. His breathing seemed to be back to normal but he still felt the trail of tears that had soaked his face.

"Thank you, Vee," he whispered, his throat still scratchy from all the screaming.

Vee purred, its amorphous mass fraying into hundreds of tentacles and disappearing under its skin. Eddie got up, still wobbly, and shut himself in the bathroom. He rubbed his hands together, feeling Father Dawson's blood still under his fingernails. He looked horrible, dark circles under his eyes. At least he had an article to write to distract himself.

Eddie had spent hours sitting in front of his laptop tidying up the material they had managed to collect for his latest report. The massacre at the docks had been on the news rotation all morning but Eddie tried not to pay attention to it. At the moment no one was mentioning a cannibal alien and that was all that mattered.

**"It could not be considered cannibalism if we are not of the same species"** Vee replied.

"I thought you couldn't read my thoughts." Eddie reached down to pick up the pen he had just dropped on the floor.

**“Some are easier to catch than others. Sometimes there is too much noise in your head to understand anything. It is easier when you speak. We like to hear you.”**

"Oh." Eddie stared at the laptop screen, his motionless hands on the keyboard.

His mind seemed to go a thousand an hour. It was as if the ground had opened under his feet. It was impossible to know how much Vee was able to see and understand.

“And my memories? Can you see them?” He asked without moving his body one iota, the tension keeping him completely frozen.

**"Eddie, we have no secrets. What worries you that we might see?** ”

Eddie slammed the lid of the laptop shut and leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes. It was the simplest and most difficult question Vee had asked him thus far and he felt unable to answer.

"There are certain things that stay with you all your life." Eddie sighed. "The first time I tried to explain to my father what was happening when I was alone with Father Dawson, he didn't believe me. And I'm a man. It shouldn't affect me like this, but I suppose I still believe that what Father Dawson did was my fault. I guess it terrifies me that you won't want to be with me when you see.”

**“We are Venom. It doesn't matter what happened before. We chose you.”** Ve purred curled up on his lap.

"I'm glad you’re so sure" he replied "but do you think our next date could involve less blood and guts?" Eddie stroked him distractedly, relishing the sensation of Vee's warm mass between his fingers.

Vee seemed to be pondering the answer. Its mass split into filaments that seemed to want to capture Eddie's fingers, twisting in an infinite dance.

**"Hungry, Eddie."**

"At least you have your priorities in order," Eddie got up. The kitchen looked like the scene of a pitched battle but ignored the pans piling up in the sink and pulled out a bar of dark chocolate.

Vee reappeared next to his shoulders. His serpentine form followed the bar with his huge opaline eyes, his mouth open with his sharp teeth.

"For an amorphous alien you are surprisingly cute," Eddie laughed as he saw the bar disappear into Vee’s jaws.

**"Cute? Cute?! We are not cute!!”** Vee's face disappeared before the black mass did too.

"Whatever you say, Vee." Eddie shook his head in exasperation and, taking another bar from his stash, tore an ounce and nibbled on it. At least one of them was able to enjoy the bitter taste of chocolate melting against his tongue.

Eddie sat back down at his computer. The night was going to be very long if he wanted to be able to deliver something publishable that same week. Vee kept grumbling, outraged at the disgraceful adjective. Eddie tried not to laugh as Vee flooded his mind with images of them like Venom, his more than two feet and the huge jaw capable of ripping a human head and smashing it in seconds.

"That doesn’t mean that you aren’t very cute" Eddie kissed the fleeting tendril that had just stolen the rest of the chocolate.

**"We are not cute"** Vee groaned, a tentacle coiling around his wrist.

"Okay, okay," Eddie held up his hands in surrender. "I didn’t want to offend."


	6. Chapter 6

The sticky heat of early July made falling asleep almost impossible but when he finally did it, Eddie always had the same dream. He was convinced that the only thing keeping his throat from being raw was Vee. More than one night he had risen suddenly, unable to control his retching. Tonight was no different.

In his dream, Eddie found himself sitting on the confessional bench again, the curtain closed behind him. The gloom hid his face and the lattice didn’t let him see the man on the other side. Father Dawson's voice broke the stony silence.

"Forgive me Father, for I have sinned" Eddie heard the words come from his own lips. “I made a promise to someone very important to me but I have not been able to keep it.”

"You shouldn't have come." On the other side, Father Dawson looked nervous. He could hear each of his racing beats.

"I promised Eddie we'd keep him safe," Eddie whispered maliciously. His mouth didn't have enough room to be able to contain the sharp tongue inside it. "You make us liars."

Father Dawson got up. The confessional door closed with a sharp knock. Vee's mass expanded from his arms and he grabbed the priest by the neck. It was Venom who came out of the confessional, enjoying the death rattles of Father Dawson. The man tried to force air into his lungs, his face getting redder and redder. Venom kept squeezing, enjoying every moment until the vertebrae creaked under the pressure. Venom dropped the limp body onto the altar. The first lights of the morning painted a kaleidoscope when crossing the rosette that crowned the apse. None of his nightmares had seemed so real. There were no hysterical laughs, no questioning glances. Eddie screamed desperately, locked inside Vee's mass. Anger and hatred seemed to overwhelm everything. All he wanted was to wake up. It all seemed too real.

**"He can't hurt us anymore,"** Venom purred contentedly.

The bells rang out throughout the building and pain shot through them like lightning. The symbiote disappeared, too weak to maintain its shape, leaving him alone on his knees before the altar. Eddie seemed to have forgotten how to breathe. Father Dawson's hand slipped and plummeted before his eyes. Eddie was unable to look away. The bitter taste of his vomit caught him off guard.

"Vee tell me this is not real," he whispered although he already knew the answer.

It was the first time he felt like a murderer. Eddie staggered to his feet. His hands trembled. He heard footsteps behind him. A group of old women stared at him, terror etched on their faces. Eddie fled through the side door that led to the sacristy. The screams raised like chants in a coven. The daylight dazzled him as soon as he was outside and he collided with people. He needed to get away from there. The passers-by stared at him. He didn't even want to imagine what he must have looked like, running madly on the half-empty streets. He needed to disappear at any cost.

Eddie turned in an alley and leaned against the wall. He felt sweat sticking his shirt to his back and slipping down his forehead. He took a deep breath. Vee throbbed under his skin. His legs burned from the effort.

**"Get down!"** Vee screamed inside his head as a shot rang out in the alley. Eddie barely noticed a bite on his shoulder before seeing the blood soaking into his sweatshirt.

"Shit," he muttered, pressing down on the wound and crouching behind a dumpster. A second shot ricocheted off the metal of the dumpster. Eddie leaned out trying to see his assailant. He distinguished two figures against the light.

"They want him alive." Eddie was convinced he had heard that voice before but was unable to remember where.

"They want the alien alive, no one has said that the host has to survive." The man smiled changing the ammunition clip of the weapon with an expert movement. His face hidden under a blue balaclava. "Just do your part."

"We are not murderers," Eddie recognized the woman, her hair almost white and a pink streak framing her face.

"Speak for you," the man pushed her away against the brick wall and raised the gun again.

The wound on his shoulder had finally stopped bleeding. Eddie squatted forward trying to reach the end of the alley. One shot hit him in the middle of the back and another in the shoulder blade. The impacts knocked him to the ground on his knees. Eddie leaned back against the wall, where the angle kept him safe for the moment, and he watched as Vee pushed the bullets to the ground. Eddie stared at them, the metal bloodied.

"They know who we are," Eddie muttered, getting up again. Vee's mass enveloped him like a cuirass.

**"I can take care of them."** Eddie noticed how the slimy mass completely enveloped him, hidden under his clothes.

"You've taken care of enough stuff for today," Eddie growled. "Just make sure we get out of this alive."

Eddie kept running. He was about to reach the next corner when an extremely high-pitched scream ran through the alley. The glass in the nearest windows shattered into a thousand pieces. Eddie staggered. The headache was excruciating and his ears were ringing but he kept moving forward.

“Vee! Are you okay?” Eddie yelled but there was no response. He walked without knowing where he was going, almost blind with pain. He was moving as fast as he could, his hand resting against the wall and trying to disappear into the crowd. He heard the screams before realizing that a new shot had hit him in the stomach.

"Vee, it hurts." Eddie stood looking at his bloody hand. Melissa watched him from the alley. Vee was still not reacting. Eddie closed his eyes, knowing that there was nowhere to run. The world seemed to have gone mad around him. The ambulance sirens and police cars sounded closer and closer. When he opened his eyes again, Melissa had disappeared and he was still alive.

Eddie woke up to the antiseptic scent stuck in his nostrils. He hardly remembered anything about the ambulance ride. The last few hours were unrelated flashes of EMT personnel taping the wound in his stomach with gauze, taking his pulse and asking him questions. He remembered the transfusion bag hanging above his head. The words of the medical staff were nothing more than noise. He thought he had called Vee in his delirium, pleading him to wake up. The stitches on his belly tugged every time he lay down trying to find a more comfortable position in bed. Eddie cursed whoever had decided to put the serum in his left arm. Every time he moved, he felt the needle sink into the flesh. Time seemed to pass at a strange pace in the hospital room.

"Vee?" Eddie whispered, fearing nothing but silence. "Are you okay?"

**"Tired. We could have closed the wound but Dan thinks it would be suspicious.”**

“A little, yes. People don't heal from gunshot wounds in seconds and if someone is chasing us, we don't need to make things easier for them.” Eddie patted his belly. He felt absolutely nothing. "Is it you or the drugs?"

**"Someone is coming."** Vee put him on alert.

Eddie heard footsteps on the other side of the door. Dan opened it, a smile on his lips.

"Glad to see you're already awake. How are you feeling?” Dan took a lightpen out of his pocket. Eddie closed his eyes briefly as he felt the light against his eyes.

"As good as can be with a bullet hole in the stomach," Eddie shrugged. "Do you think you’ll release me soon?"

Dan barely had time to answer when a man entered the room showing his badge and introducing himself as a detective. For a moment, Eddie believed that whoever was chasing them had come to finish the job.

"If he's already awake, I'd like to speak to him."

"You're going to have to wait for the recognition to finish," Dan's voice sounded annoyed.

"It will only be two minutes," the detective insisted.

"You’re going to have to wait." Dan pushed him out of the room and closed the door behind him. "What trouble are you in now?" Dan shook his head.

**"We are the new protectors of San Francisco,"** Vee purred contentedly, tendrils escaping from Eddie's fingers.

"Don't ask," Eddie sighed looking at the ceiling. "Is there going to be any problem if Vee already closes the wound?"

"Wait to speak to the detective. When you finish you’ll have your discharge papers ready.”

**"Thanks, Dan!"** One of the tendrils waved goodbye before disappearing into Eddie's body.  **"We like him. Do you think he would let us share Annie?”**

"Mr. Brock," the detective came in the room before Eddie could reply to Vee. He paid attention to him for the first time. He was an older man, he must have been in his fifties, with a perfectly trimmed beard and a small notebook between his fingers. “It seems that you had a difficult day.”

"No shit" Eddie crossed his arms, he didn't like the condescending tone the man was using with him at all. “I suppose that's what you have when two psychopaths decide to shoot you in broad daylight.”

"It seems that it is not the first time that you have had problems of this style," the detective sat in the plastic chair by the bed. "Do you know who shot you and why?"

“Being a journalist sometimes makes enemies. But no, no idea.”

"And you won't know anything about Father Dawson, either?" The man added without raising his face from his notebook. "They found him dead near where they shot you. Perhaps it’s related.”

"What, Do you think" Eddie narrowed his eyes, trying to figure out what the detective was playing. "that the same people who shot me killed Father Dawson?"

“It's a possibility. Did you know him?”

“He was a priest of our congregation. He officiated my first communion. Everyone who grew up in the neighborhood knows him.”

"And do you think someone could have reasons to end his life?" The man stuck the pen in the pad.

"I haven't seen him in over twenty years, I don't know what information I can give you." Eddie tried to get comfortable in bed.

"All right, Mr. Brock. I won't bother you anymore.” And handing him a card, he added, “If you remember anything, call me and don't leave town.”

The man said goodbye and left, closing the door behind him.

"Shit," Eddie covered his eyes with his hands. “Shit.”

He lay in bed, his gaze lost in infinity. He didn't know how long it had been. The minutes seemed to last forever. It was like staying in one of his nightmares, but the reality was much worse.

**"Sorry Eddie."** Vee's strands coiled around his belly, closing the wound. The black pitch spread across his skin like a lover's hug.

"Don't be sorry, Vee. I'm glad he's dead." Eddie stroked the jet mass and let the tendrils curl between his fingers. “God, he is dead.”

He touched his cheeks when he felt the tears slipping down his face. It was as if a dam had broken and soon his crying became a desperate sob. It was real. Father Dawson was dead.


End file.
